Gzorpe Goodies, Mofos!

Our work is having a Halloween food week, so I wanted to make these snacks I used to eat named Gzorpe Goodies. Long story short, these things are awesome. Rice Krispies® Treats can't hold a Snap-Crackle-candle to Gzorpe Goodies. I never liked nuts, so I always made them without, but they were always awesome. We would keep them in the fridge and they'd be gone before 24 hours were over.

After Google revealed to me that the internet holds no record of the best cereal-based snack in the history of the world, I had to phone home for my mom to send me this recipe off of the back of a really old (70s, I think) Kix® box. The box features 4 cartoon characters, I think they were all aliens, drawn in classic 70s cereal cartoon style, each with unpronounceable names (like Gzorpe) and their own Kix® recipe. I'm actually not sure if these below were really named "Gzorpe Goodies," but it is the only name I can remember off of the back of the box.

So, without further ado, I present to the world, the Internet's first known reprint of Kix® Gzorpe Goodies!

Gzorpe Goodies

• 3 Tbsp. butter


• 1/2 lb. (40) large marshmallows


• 4 cups Kix® cereal


• 1/4 cup coarsely chopped nuts


• 1/2 cup moist shredded coconut


• 4 oz. sweet or semisweet chocolate, melted

Melt butter and marshmallows over low heat, stirring constantly. Remove from heat. Stir in Kix, nuts and coconut. Turn out into buttered 8- or 9- inch square pan. With piece of waxed paper, pat out mixture evenly in pan.

Pour melted chocolate over top; spread in a thin layer. Chill until set, 45 to 60 minutes. Cut into 2 x 1-inch bars. Makes 32 bars.